The world is tough and survival of the fittest is the code. As parents, it’s our responsibility to train and help our children develop survival skills, especially using mental strength. A Yoruba adage says “Alagbari ni oga alagbara” meaning “A mentally strong person will always be the boss of those who depends on raw power.” Mentally strong children have an inner and outer sense of control, they view challenges as inevitable platforms for success. They are well charged to handle life’s bumps and knocks. Our success as parents will be reflected in how our children successfully handle life’s challenges.

Here are useful tips which can help us to teach, coach, and inspire children to be mentally strong:

1. Stop negativity before it becomes a habit

Children adopt words from their parents’ vocabularies, so it is essential to be aware of this concept and strife to teach ourselves to utter words that will build our children’s lives. We know that pessimism and outright negative words can easily transition from just a verbal expression to uncontrollable habits. Developing a strategy like a private code to flag negative comments to our children will be helpful to interrupt such words or sentences. For example, when a child makes a negative statement like “I don’t think I can handle this”, or “I just can’t win” you could give the child a double blink or rub your nose or pull your ear.

It can also work wonders if we cultivate the habit of acknowledging and praising every act of optimism from our children – Oh! That’s sweet!! I know you can! That’s my guy/gal!

2. Use helpful mantras.

Words are powerful! Words can break bones! Developing and saying affirmative words can help diffuse frustrations and anxiety. It improves focus, self-confidence, and esteem, as well as brings clarity to our minds. In my home, we are fond of saying “I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me” when our kids resolve to give up. Other helpful mantras are: I am brave, I am calm, I can handle this, every day brings new opportunities, no challenge is beyond me, and so on.

3. Train them to brainstorm

We are in the position to educate our children that the trick to unlocking solutions to challenges is to ‘spark their brains till the fire is ignited’. The world needs solution givers, fallow land breakers, and firebrands that won’t give up (thinking) until something (good) happens. One of the ways to “tap” the brain up is to think – to brainstorm. This C.A.A.T.S acronym can help the children easily recall the brainstorming steps:

*Calm down to think

*Acknowledge the problem(s),

*Ask: “What can I do better?”

*Tell all you can do to solve the problem(s)

*Select the best choice

Selah!

© SELAH SERIES 2022