Divorce is the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body; or as SEPARATION or SEVERANCE. It is the legal process to end a marriage. 

Earlier, I submitted various concepts and positions on divorce amongst Christians, particularly those being projected based on the scriptures. I referred to Jesus and Apostle Paul addressing similar reasons for divorce as recorded in Matthew 19:1-10, Matt 5: 32, and I Corinthians chapter 7. (The abridged article is available on the MRS Whatsapp platform and can be forwarded on request). 

From definitions and practice, divorce terminates a marriage and frees both parties from the marriage commitment and vows. Divorce is the dissolution of a godly institute. This discourse will refer to Jesus’ statement in Matt 19: 6 and Mark 10:9 and is best understood when taken from Matthew’s account. “Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder.” Amongst other places across the scriptures, this is a verse where God’s position on divorce is unequivocal. The “No more” in the text connotes a ceasing to be individuals and henceforth becoming a couple - an irreversible transformation. Jesus is saying that Marriage under God (God Joined) is an irreversible transformation hence the warning - let no man put asunder.

Under the Law, it takes an equal or superior authority to undo whatever has been done. According to Jesus, it will require God (His equal) or a higher authority (if you can come up with any) to undo the marriage bond. While I understand the complexities and grievous experiences of many within marriages and do not ignore innumerable justifications for divorce, I believe it is at variance with God’s position. Divorce is precipitated in the spirit that personality differences cannot be resolved and only provides an escape from the other party rather than solving the fundamental character flaws of the individuals. It should be noted that sometimes, both parties are responsible for the differences.

We must understand that the irreconcilable differences that parties cannot forgive one another of, will not be permitted in heaven. The inability to adjust for the other party won’t be allowed in heaven. God in history demonstrated this through His love for the Israelites by always being ready to take them back each time they returned to Him. God even used Prophet Hosea to model His expectation from His own. 

As established in the scriptures, there are numerous ways to handle differences and disagreements within marriages. Separation for a time until peace can be restored is the climax. Christian Leaders and the Church should be responsible for providing instructions, counsel, guidance and support to individuals and struggling couples. 

The Lord who asked us to “pray for our enemies” and “to do good to those who hate us” did not ask us to shut the door to repentance and reconciliation. Reconciliation is our ministry. God not only forebears but pardons, and he teaches us to do the same.

In conclusion, although divorce is now seen by many as the first line of marital conflict management, that isn’t God’s plan for any home. While God isn’t against separation where circumstances call for such, e.g. cases of abuse, He leaves room for restoration. God wants us to pray for our “enemies” and “to do good to those who hate us”. He also wants us to keep the ‘door’ of repentance and reconciliation open as once-divorced couples can reunite again if the proper and godly steps are taken.

Pastor Oluwamayowa Popoola

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